one of those sappy blog posts

I am not the most mushy person in the world. And basically I like to keep my private matters just like that private. i think thats what make me such a bad blogger!! But... I am going to go out of my comfort zone a bit and publisize (i dont know if thats a word) my private !! From the previous post you understand kinda the sitution I am in. Through all of this I have briefly told you that brock was great, but i wanted to tell you how great !!!!
You know what a little bunny rabbit looks like when you put a spot light on it, or a deer in headlights look??? The first time I had my pain--in idaho--although i didnt get to see him when my mom told him she was taking me to the hospital and he needed to hurry and get there, I imagine brock having that look on his face. When he first got to the hospital he immediately came and sat on my bed gave me a quick kiss, rubbed my arm and asked if he could do anything for me. The whole time i was in that hospital bed I saw a look of desperation on his face although my family was joking around me and we were giggling here and there Brock was paying attention to and anticipating my every need. The nurse said i needed to drink water so brock came and sat on my bed again and tried to get it down me. even though we went home thinking i was just dehydrated Brock carried me downstairs, put me in bed, brought me some water just in case i needed it, and warmed me up since i was still shivering.
now i know these sound like simple easy tasks that you think to yourself well if my loved one were in this situation i would probably do the same thing...and maybe you would. Brock did!!
I am not going to take you through each hospital visit But i will tell you that since i work nights and have to catch up on my sleep during the days I have kinda been the worst house wife ever. I have woke up some days to Brock having the house spotless--dishes done, carpets vaccuumed. the whole 9 yards!!
The last but not least, the last "episode" that i had lasted from about 6:30 to about 4 in the morning. It was bearable but brock sat by my side the ENTIRE time. for the first hour he drove me around because we thought it would take my mind off it. Then everytime my breathing changed because my pain would get more intense i would see brock stop what he was doing and put his full attention on me. He called the hospital and demanded to talk to the oncall OB at 3 in the morning. He refused to go to bed because he didnt want me to go through this alone....
I honestly dont know who reads my blog and unless you are some creep putting the heads of my pictures on inappropriate pictures i dont care that ya do in fact welcome i hope you enjoy your stay..... I just dont think that i am as kind and thoughtful and caring as Brock has been. I have been blessed to have been able to marry him! I have been blessed to have such an amazing man that is selfless, caring, and attentive to me and my every need. I am so greatful that brock is a worthy priesthood holder. I know that my pain has been lessened because of his faith. During times of struggle it is sometimes difficult to see the bigger picture, Brock has continually given me strength by helping me increase my faith and showing me a christlike example. i say that i love him and i do so so so much but it just doesnt feel like the right word... i wish there was more that i could say because what i think & feel for this sweet man seems like so much more !!!!